Learn to Travel Light

Baggage. We all have some. (You do too! You know you do, so fess up!) Some of us have more than others. Whether you are lugging around a tattered duffel, or you have accumulated enough of a past to lay claim to a steamer trunk, you don't have to own it forever! (I have an old and threadbare 5 piece set that I'm trying to toss.) You can get rid of your baggage! I am living proof. I used to have a 6 piece set and a footlocker. Here's to freedom!

How to abandon your old useless baggage:

Step 1 - Acknowledge the baggage as useless.

Step 2 - Be willing to walk away without your baggage.

Don't worry. Security will not stop you.

Step 3 - See Step 1 again. Remember: Pointing out

another person's baggage doesn't count. Nice try,

though.

Step 4 - Don't try to leave all of your baggage at

once. A small carry-on bag is fine to start out with.

Leave the steamer trunk for a little later.

Step 5 - Don't try to get rid of your baggage by

ringing a friend's door bell, dumping it all on their

doorstep and running away. First of all, it's unfair

and obnoxious. Second, if you really like your friend

you won't leave an obstacle for them to trip over the

next time they venture out!

Step 6 - Remember that the idea behind clearing your

baggage cart is the idea of traveling light. Your

reward will be the feeling of freedom and

accomplishment. You will no longer have to carry that

weight around. Someone attached to a baggage cart, is

never fun at parties.  It's also a very bad idea to

bring your baggage into a relationship. Your new

favorite  person probably won't have the spare space

for all of your baggage. OK...an overnight bag is cool

but don't bring the footlocker with you!Bringing

baggage with you and asking your partner to help you

store it, is an imposition at the very least.It's

certainly a mood killer!

Step 7 - Open the first piece of baggage and look at

what you are hauling around. If you are dragging your

hated third grade teacher around with you to prove

that you won't succeed,you already know you don't want

her influence anymore. If you open that case and see

your ex and all of their baggage tucked in with

yours, you can take that to the nearest dumpster and

heave ho! (We call them ex.'s for a reason!) If you

are carrying around a joyless or harmful relationship

with someone, then ask yourself why.Seriously...why? Doesn't it make more sense to let go of the misery rather than cling to the baggage strap and drag that crap back onto the train? Duh?

Step 7 may be the most important step. In this step we

are facing our worst insecurities, our most horrible

fears and a deep well of failure and regret. It takes

a brave soul to open that case and look at the

darkness inside. You are that brave soul. You know

that its just useless baggage, with no power of its

own to stay with you. You have been the one clinging

to the handle. This is your life. You are the powerful

one. You can now be the one to recognize the things in

this case for what they are...and just...let go.

Step 8 - Swing your arm forward with all of your

strength, allowing momentum to help and let go of the

handle.

Step 9 - Watch that baggage soar into the nearest

trash can. (Yay! You did it! Woohoo!)

Step 10 - Take a deep breath, roll your neck and

shoulders to loosen up and flex those stiffened, tired

fingers. That felt great! That damn thing was getting

heavier every year!

Step 11 - Walk away...Really walk away. You won't

really miss it, you are just used to lugging that bag

with you everywhere you go. So...walk away and keep

walking.

Step 12 - Never-ever look back.

Personal Power

Accept your personal power. I am not speaking of power over others, because that is an empty definition. I am speaking of power over our own lives. How many times have we blamed outside influences as reasons for why our lives are unfulfilled or out of control? How many times have we given others the blame for and the keys to our lives?

Personal power is the feeling of control over your life and a pride in knowing that you can stand on your own decisions. It is recognizing that you have a voice in your life and can make valid contributions to your community. It is seeing that you have much to learn without invalidating the work you have put in thus far. After all, we are works in progress. It is recognizing that others may have opinions about your life, but it is you who choose to internalize those opinions or not. Ultimately we, as adults, are the ones who choose our destinies since we are the ones who must live with the consequences of our decisions. Power is not the freedom from responsibility. It is responsibility. No surprise that so many of us want to give it away!

Years ago, I gave away my personal power by believing that others knew more about what my life should be, than I did. I found myself apologizing for wanting to do certain things or feeling the need to justify my dreams with practical anchors. Okay, you might think that’s stupid. If you do then you’re right. It was. I had no one to blame but myself. I remember believing in myself as a child, but somewhere along that road I gave my power away. It took years of growth, hard lessons and good friends but I did take back my personal power. I will never give it away again.

There are so many ways in which we give that power away - through apathy or fear, in abusive relationships, through conformity, in exchange for approval and through not trusting ourselves as much as the person or established entity we define as “better”, “smarter” or “stronger”. We need to believe in our own worth. By comparing ourselves to others, we never see the whole screen shot. That is not to say that I shouldn’t ask for and take advice. It doesn’t mean that I see myself as ‘knowing it all”, it just means that I am the one who has the right to deem the advice valid as it pertains to myself. I have to feel right with it, because I have to live with it.

Personal power is not to be given away as if it were worthless. Nor is it to be flaunted or used to push others around. Those who paint an image of power, constantly asserting their worth, usually use that image as armor against hurt. (Think back to the class bully in grammar school.) Personal power is meant to strengthen us, so that we can meet our own challenges, make our own choices and set our own goals. When we feel strong within ourselves we no longer need to maintain the illusion of armor. There are those in this world with a sweet tooth for power. We run across these people in all parts of our daily lives. (We see it in government all the time!) They never see themselves as having enough of it and they covet (covet: a word of biblical proportion!) the power of others. The only way that they can gain power over your sense of self worth is if you allow them to have it. No one has the right to make you feel inferior, unless you give them the permission to do so. My mother always said that. Though it’s hardly original, that doesn't make it any less true. Follow your own path honorably. Look upon your choices pro-actively. Weigh advice fairly and along side your own instincts. Trust yourself and always be ready to learn from your own mistakes as well the mistakes of others. We are not perfect, so learning is always an option. And remember that there are always others who look to you for inspiration and strength…if you give it away, what are you saying to them?

Licorice

Licorice is a glossy,yummy,ssssslippery ssssslide of latex overalls, with an almost sheer bandeau top and silver clasp and shorty fingerless latex and fishnet gloves. So form fitting it looks poured on. ...And maybe it was. ;)


WARNING: Licorice is not for the meek. Don't ask where you should wear it....Just wear it and strut!. Fire Extinguisher not included.

Available at Gwen Carillon Designs on Elements in Design and on the Second Life Marketplace

Special thanks to Ravie for naming this one!

Pictured in Licorice Photo:
Hair : Lelutka "Jolie"
Boots: Bax Coen Designs "Black Leather Ankle Boot"
Hat : GCD Cowboy / girl Hat "Charcoal"
Tattoo: GCD Red red Divine, & Cheek Cleavage with Rose Tattoo

Pumpkin Ssssspicce

I decided to design lingerie that echoed how I felt about autumn. It had to include the warmth of a hearth-side on a brisk evening and the spice of a cup of slowly mulled wine....That delicious feeling as that warmth spreads to tingling nerve endings. And so I created Pumpkin Spice. Fall never tasted so good.

At GCD...we specialize in heavy breathing.

Available at Gwen Carillon Designs and on the Second Life Marketplace




Includes:
Bra and Panties in All Layers 
Lace Stockings with Sculpted Bows 
Black Satin Panty Bows (they are modifiable...don't leave the bows buried in your hips, ladies!)
Soft Black Feather Boa 
Black Pearl Bra Accent

Wild Heart

Introducing the Wild Heart Collection! Jewelry that's as versatile as you are! It's very boho, very chic and very smexy!

More choices, more options...just MORE! LOL

There are times we struggle to get the right look with accessories.  Let's say you are in a soft flowing skirt and tank, and you want to wear jewelry to complete the look. You hunt through your inventory only to find either shiny, fancy jewelry that's too busy with the outfit or....you find great casual jewelry that misses the mark on length for your neckline! LOL Been there. That's why I created Wild Heart.  The Wild Heart Collection is casual. dressy, long, short, simple, complex and completely sexy and fun! Go a lot wild... ;)

Collection Includes:

4 necklace versions
2beaded bracelets
2beaded anklets
1belly ring
beaded hoop earrings

Vest:: GCD G Jeans Messy paint set sold separately.
Skirt: GCD Urban Gypsy
Hair: Truth "Pia"
This set is sold as transfer only. I have included simple and deletable re-sizing scripts and instructions to get the perfect fit.

Wings

Did I say I wasn't brave? Guess what? I've discovered something really important. It takes bravery to walk forward. It takes courage to live and accept mistakes. I screw up sometimes. We all do. But if we can accept that and move forward, I think that counts as bravery. Sometimes we move forward alone...and sometimes we get pulled along by friends. I won't waste time regretting the decisions I've made. That's done and gone. Placing energy on things that are unalterable is just plain stupid. I'm not going to spend my life trying to fix something that wants to stay broken. I'm grateful for the lesson (not really- *laughs*) and hopefully I've passed the pop quiz and won't have to retake this particular class. This Jersey Girl has wings and she's not afraid to use them!

Still Dancing

Photos used, courtesy of Carabella Babii

A while ago I posted a blog piece about my sculpture Fire Dance. Funny how you can forget your own words. I reread that post and reminded myself of some things I learned. Dancing in flames is always a risk. I know this and dance anyway. I dance for myself. I dance to dispel fear. I dance to embrace life. I dance in blind faith. Faith, that love is real and is the only thing worth the dance. When happily ever after is just dust in the crease of the book binding, faith makes me turn the page and keep dancing. Am I an idiot to think that the dance itself is worth the risk of crash and burn? Maybe...(laughs) but I'm an optimist. I always turn the page. Ultimately, I do this for me. I have let fear rule me in the past. I will never do so again. Am I still scared? Of course I am. Sometimes I'm so scared I freeze. Then I remember that I am more than my failures, more than my mistakes and more than my fears. I guess it comes down to this: Live or let fear swallow me in an endless loop of doubt and regret. So...I dance. I play my music, dance and celebrate being alive. If I crash and burn, I think of the phoenix and I remember I will get up and dance again and again and again.....

I close my eyes

And see yours

I can reach out

Touch your cheek

In a moment

We never shared

But always had.

September Wind

Mid September and fall announced an early arrival with an audible hiss through late summer branches. The weather changed. I sit curled up into a letter C on my not so new couch, listening to the wind do its worst as it sends splatter after splatter of rain against the window panes. New Jersey in the fall. You can actually taste it in the air. When I was little, it tasted like a goodbye and a hello all rolled into one - like an end of summer song. It tasted of back to school clothing, lunches packed neatly in colorful metal boxes and Halloween candy. Fall. My birthday is in the fall. It was always kind of a double whammy. I 'd look forward to my birthday, but with it came school and a goodbye to lazy summer. Shifting on the couch , I reach down and drag an old worn afghan over my legs and close my eyes. Not to sleep. For some reason I can't sleep, though I know I'm tired. Thoughts swirl round in my head. some innocuous, some stinging. The ones that sting carry a "you should have ...(fill in appropriate chore)" with them. When I was little...it was just about homework. Now? It's about everything. Now, fall just tastes like goodbye.

Change is what fall is all about. Moving on, we leave pleasant summer memories behind and step into the uncertainty of a September wind. We never really feel secure or safe. There is no safety when you are an adult. If you fall, you have to hold out your own arms and catch yourself. If you also have children, like I do, you have to catch them too. My house is a safe little nest. It is a shelter against that storm spitting rain against the windows. My house is also a stinging thought. A reminder of how tenuous my hold is and how far down I can fall. This is my family's shelter. Their only shelter. And September's wind is just beyond these walls. My thoughts drift back to my parents. How my mother must have felt hearing the September wind, while shopping for my new school shoes. How my father must have felt hearing the September wind while he balanced the check book. I would like to say that I wish I'd known, so that I could appreciate what they might have felt, but I'm glad I didn't. I'm glad my own children don't. Children should think about running through piles of crisp leaves or sneaking into the Halloween candy stash. They should never know the fear of fall...of falling.

The Language of Art

Art isn't something reserved for the deserving few. Art is a universal form of communication. It allows us to speak with one another in ways that go beyond conventional language. Art speaks to our emotional core. Image replaces syntax, stirring our emotions with color and shape, harmony and dissonance, poetry and prose. This language of art reaches across disciplines. It bridges societal differences and schools of thought. Art is the common language of the mythical Tower of Babel, encouraging us to collaborate and explore and accept new ideas.

Although we may love and appreciate art, we have not all experienced the creating of art first hand, since arts and crafts in grammar school. We don't finger paint any more. We have put the crayolas away and channeled our creative sides into more practical outlets that seem more acceptable and less frivolous to us. Many of us learn early in life that art is not a necessity but a luxury... something we can play with but must put away when life gets serious. But Art is not a luxury. It is a necessary expression of the human spirit. Art connects us on the soul level.

But let's not over-analyze art. That would take the fun out of it...kind of like trying to read the tea leaves rather than enjoying the tea. Instead let's enjoy it, immerse ourselves in it and let it take us to new places in our minds.

What if you could create anything you wanted, shape your environment at will, be your dream self ...even fly? Oh wait...you can! It's called Second Life. The limits we have are the ones we place on ourselves and our own creativity. Why would we do that? (laughs)Second Life is full of possibilities. All we need to do is open ourselves to those possibilities and explore! We don't need to limit ourselves to our "real life" existence, but instead take the brakes off of our imaginations and soar. We don't have to choose between Second Life and First Life. Second Life is not meant to replace “real life." It isn't an imitation of “real life.” Second Life stands alone on its own merit as a separate dimension, rich in dreams and beauty. It is a vehicle for exploring our creative sides. Creativity has no bounds and accepts no limitations. When I first got into world in May of 2006, I was amazed at the color and texture around me. Sure, I walked into walls for a while, in my default skin and hair, and wore boxes on my head at the shoe store. Newbie concerns aside, I fell in love with the freedom of imagination! I hope you will too.

Over the Rainbow - Posted in Prim Perfect Issue 13

What if you could create anything you wanted, shape your environment at whim, be your dream self ...even fly? Oh wait...you can! It's called Second Life. The limits we have are the ones we place on ourselves and our own creativity. Why would we do that? (laughs) Second Life is full of possibilities. All we need to do is open ourselves to those possibilities and explore! We don't need to limit ourselves to our Real Life existence. Take the brakes off of your imagination and soar. Real life has it's place. Second Life is not meant to replace “real life”. It isn't an imitation of “real life”. Second Life stands alone on it's own merit as a separate dimension, rich in dreams and beauty.When I first got into world in May of 2006, I was amazed at the color and texture around me. Sure, I walked into walls for a while, in my default skin and hair, and wore boxes on my head at the shoe store. Newbie concerns aside, I fell in love with the freedom of imagination!

My first in world experience was on the island of Serenite owned by Keith Extraordinaire. Sereine Bard, showed me around. I felt like I'd landed over the rainbow! (smiles) I was asked (dragged in was more like it) to try Second Life, by my “real life” friend Robin Sojourner (Wood). She had been trying to get me into world for about two years! I would look at the web site and say..."na...what do I need with a virtual world. I'm not into computer games." and I'd shelve the idea. Then came the day I didn't. Wow. This was no computer game. How could I have known? The first thing I did was redecorate Robin's cabin. I almost ruined her existing furniture! (laughing) I started building almost immediately. I couldn't wait to create things. I bought a nice piece of land in Nitida and my friend Keith Extraordinaire gave me a cottage to "live in". I was in heaven. *smiles* My friend and then neighbor, Twome Rutledge, helped me to shop and she explained the nuances of SL. My friend Morse Dillon explained the basics of building. I found “busy mode” and used it a lot! My first couch, was the ugliest thing imaginable. I loved it.(grins) I made it. It was mine. I kept building. My friend Sereine said, "You should sell this stuff!" I rented a booth in an "outdoor market". By July of 2006 I had enough inventory to open up a store. I love Elements In Design. It's been a labor of love and a constant source of joy, from the start.

I had kind of an “aha” moment recently. I realized that Second Life cannot ever be like the physical world that our computers reside in. Unlike the “real world”, where politics and bureaucracy abide, Second Life is run entirely by creatives! No wonder it's magical! We make it that way! No matter how tough things get here with grid issues and IP theft, we need to remember the tremendous opportunities that Second Life has afforded us. Think about this: We can create without limits, we can work, doing what we love and we can immerse ourselves in a community that makes art a priority! We are Second Life. Creating art in Second Life has renewed my art in “real life”. Two and a half years later, I still can't believe that this world has absorbed me so completely. Yet...I found bits of myself, that I didn't know existed. I opened to this experience and this experience opened me. I found friends that speak to my soul. I found creativity without boundaries. Nothing for me will ever be the same.

IP theft is a huge thorn that needs to be dealt with. We all agree that there are steps that need to be taken to get the rampant piracy under control. One Linden Lab employee, in particular is making a difference. Blue Linden, With the help of some of his collegues, has drafted and submitted a proposal, for a Creators Registry. That registry would help to highlight legitimate businesses and help consumers to weed out the shops stocked with pirated goods. Contact Linden Lab and ask for the Creators Registry to be implemented. You can read more about this registry on the CCA blog. We, as creatives, can either decide to be proactive and better our world or we can sit back and complain about Linden Lab not doing it for us. At some point , it falls to us, to step up and take responsibility for the direction this world takes. We are not powerless, unless we choose to be. Get involved. Help others become more aware of Intellectual Property ethics and issues. Mentor new builders and encourage creative exploration. Last but not least...No matter what happens, keep creating. It is the magic that breathes life into our world. We are the magic!

**Some additional thoughts...Panic about IP theft does us no good. Instead put that energy into helping the community to find more ways to make IP theft in Second Life less profitable. For thieves, it's about the *easy money*. CCA is focused on making it more difficult for thieves to remain comfy. We visit sites where pirated goods are being sold. We alert creators immediately. We stay proactive within the community and encourage awareness of IP rights. (And on a personal note...I did NOT spend all that time in the trenches and writing to Linden Lab, ignoring my own business, just to give up, roll over and play dead! Neither did Arwen Eusebio or Tigerlily Koi!) Challenge: Join this effort and give back to the community. Get involved in practical ways. Offer to blog, offer to mentor for CCA, volunteer to write letters, help in the trenches by going to shops selling pirated goods and taking photos and info to pass to the creators that were victimized. In other words, skip the noise and DO SOMETHING!

Off the Deep End

As you know, I am a dedicated advocate for Intellectual Property rights. It has been a trying time for creators of digital art, both web wide and in Second Life. Piracy has been rampant and theft notices seem to be an every day occurrence. Having said this, I'd like to address the issue of proof. Has the current theft epidemic finally driven some of us over the edge into paranoia? It's one thing to have your work duplicated and resold without your permission. It is quite another to think you own a popular concept. In the past two days I have seen two talented creators, both strong proponents of IP rights, Delora Starbrook and Laynie Link, accused of content theft. One because she dared to make adorned hair styles with ponytails and the other because she used glow on an outfit! Oh-My-God! What is this driving us to? In plain English...that is just nuts. Folks, I cannot stress this strongly enough: Please be certain (with proof) that theft has occurred. Ponytails and glow prims are not enough to accuse another member of our community of theft. At what point will we realize that all chairs have a seat to place your rear in. That is the nature of chairs. I make chairs. My friend Arwen makes chairs, Maxwell makes chairs, Su makes chairs...and so on. Should we all accuse one another of content theft, because they all have a place to park our butts? I am so upset at the rashness of these unfounded accusations! I'm beginning to think that some creators are throwing around the label of "content theft" and accusing their colleagues of thievery, to nix the competition. Before you accuse someone of theft , you'd best be damn certain it is theft! It is not only unethical , it is reprehensible to attempt to destroy another creator's reputation, solely because you feel slighted or threatened in some way by their work. This is about as close to a rant as I've ever gotten.

We have not worked this long and this hard to let insecurity and paranoia lead us into a panicked feeding frenzy, with our colleagues labeled "lunch"! Enough already! Let caution, reason and respect be your guides.

It's Also About Getting There

I'm sure that you have heard the saying "It isn't about the destination. It's about the journey." Well, I'll agree with that statement...to a degree. You see, in some cases it is about getting there. And sometimes, however you can get there, is OK.

We stumble through life as best we can. We have successes and we make mistakes. Both sides of the coin are part and parcel of life. I am not ashamed of my mistakes, because I know that they have helped me to grow. (And believe me , I've made some really stupid choices this past year!) The thing is, I was concentrating on the journey and ignoring the direction and the destination. That is just as silly as doing it the other way and focusing only on the destination. I was doing this day to day thing and ignoring where it was leading, which was down a dark hole. At some point, I woke up and took a good look around at my surroundings and said "Dang! How the hell did I get here?" That's when I pulled out my trusty map. We all have one. It's a built in standard feature in all humans. Anytime we get turned around and feel lost, we can whip out "the map" and get our bearings. So, I looked at my map and realized I was slightly off course. I was headed in the right general direction, but I needed to do a slight course correction.

As is often the case with me, I create a sculpture and then grow into it. I think that these sculptures may be my way of manifesting points to follow on my map. (Hey...whatever works. Right? If you know me, then you know that I am directionally challenged. I get lost turning around.) A few weeks ago, I created a sculpture that I called, "Soul's Journey". In essence, I built a beacon of hope to follow.

Life is messy, unpredictable and full of imperfection. We are human and so by our very nature flawed. Yet in our flaws and vulnerability, we are beautiful and strong. I have finally grown into "Rebirth" and "Soul's Journey". I have looked at my map, corrected my course and found hope. No, I don't have all the answers, nor even many of the questions. *laughs* However, what I have found inside myself this week is far more valuable. Me. The rest is just down the road.