Rebirth

Hi again. Taking a nice stroll through my brain. Want to tag along? Don't mind the mess. I haven't cleaned up in a while. Oh look! There's last decade's baggage still sitting in the suitcase, unpacked and taking up space. Just walk around it. I do. See the sticky notes I've left all over the place? That's to remind me of important things, like...who I am. *laughs*

Let me dust off this old chair for you. Have a seat, and we can have a nice chat about life. It's bizarre isn't it? (Life, that is) We think we've run away from something in our lives, only to find ourselves running toward it instead. There are things in our lives that help us to flourish and there are things that will kill us eventually, like a slow acting poison. Some relationships are like that. We can convince ourselves that if it feels good at the time, we can overlook the long term affects. That doesn't mean that it won't eventually kill us. It just means we chose to turn a blind eye on reality. We haven't had enough self destruction, so we take another swig from the bottle marked with the skull and crossed bones! After all, it's just an interesting design on a label, right?

Why do we choose things that we know will hurt us? I don't have an answer to that one. It isn't on a sticky note. I can tell you, that as of this month, I chose to toss away the poison, in favor of a nice cup of self esteem. It wasn't easy. A part of me still kept insisting that poison tastes good. That's when I shored myself up and said no.

Rebirth is more than a statement of being. It is hope held out, that I'll reach the antidote in time and be OK. We are more than we give ourselves credit for. We carry the entire universe within us. So, how can we know that and not feel empowered? It's not about the mistakes the we've made. It's about what we have learned from those mistakes. It's not about love turned sour. It's about knowing we can love. When we come to the realization that we can love and honor ourselves, that's when true Rebirth occurs. Once we know and love ourselves for who we are, nobody and nothing can break us.

Rebirth doesn't just happen. We choose it. We must allow it...embrace It. No one can do it for us. Once we choose that path of self acceptance and growth, the way opens and we start to feel better. I can't say that I'm at that point yet, but I feel like I can be. I'm open to the possibilities. I am open to love as well, but only the kind that heals- not the toxic kind. I want to spread my arms wide and let the stars flood in. Maybe then, I can ditch the unpacked baggage and take down the sticky notes, cause being myself is reminder enough.

Thank you Jeff, Ali, Julia, Twome, Arwen, Zazen, AJ, Johnnie, Jean and the rest of my wonderful friends for never letting me give up. I love you all. Thank you also to my children, Marin and Max, who remind me every day of what love is. The rest of you reading this may be thinking that I've been rather candid about my life in this blog. Well...yes I have. But, so what. *grins* It's not like we don't all have our own demons. It's those of us that don't admit to weakness that are ultimately frail. The rest of us learn to bend without breaking. *smiles*

**On the descriptive side, Rebirth is interactive , thanks to Keystone Bouchard and October Brotherhood, who provided some of the scripting. The Elements Family came over and we all had a nice time dancing in the universe. Rebirth premiered at my Dances of Life exhibit on Cedar Island. A special thank you to Jon Seattle and Kate Miranda, for honoring me with that show. You can experience Rebirth at Dreamscapes Gallery of Art, at the Dances of Life exhibit on Cedar Island, at The Tech and at Anandra Gallery.

Betrayal

What inspires your soul? It's different for each of us. Some find career to be the *it* for them. For me it's always been love..... The kind of love that circulates through my system like blood. Love feeds my art, which in turn feeds back into the system. It inspires me and sends me flying in all sorts of creative directions.

We do not exist in a bubble. Everything we do affects others just as everything they do affect us. What happens when the source of our inspiration is cut off? Well, I thought the answer was .."uh starve?" It's not. The answer is that the source of inspiration cannot be *cut off*. I recently went through a difficult time, emotionally. I was very upset, angry, sad ...you name it. This is what I learned. Only you can cut yourself off from your muse. I did. I told myself I was so sad I couldn't build. I told myself that my creative side had "run dry". I was so distraught, that I needed a way to vent the sadness. So, standing on my Skyland, crying, I saw the piece that I needed to build...in my head. I began rezzing prims. I was blind to my surroundings. I ignored IM's. I poured every ounce of anguish into that sculpture, as I watched it form in front of me. When I was at the point where I saw a double vision...one in my head and one in front of me...I knew it was finished. I named it "Betrayal". I felt drained...like a poison was lanced from a septic wound. Then... I felt better. I learned that nothing could stop me from being me. I create. That act of creating is love. Creativity is something that lives within each us. No one can cut us off from that flow, although the source is harder to reach for at times, it never gets cut off. If you reach for your creative side during times of sadness and stress, not only will it be still there, but the act of creating can actually help you to heal. "Betrayal" is not a pleasant sculpture to view. How could it be? "Betrayal" is the embodiment of all that anguish that lived inside of me. I even find it hard to look at. But it also stands as a testament to love and proof that I am still me. We are capable of more than we give ourselves credit for. That wellspring is in each of us, nestled within our own unique spirits and talents. So next time you are in a room that is too dark, reach out to turn on the dang light! *laughs* Don't accept that it has to be dark. You'll just end up stubbing your toe or worse. *smiles*

A hell of a Valentine's Day post to put up, but hey ...it's real. lol

A Side Trip to Dublin

Although my main focus in Second Life is creating content, there is something to be said for creating a good time. I am now spinning tunes in Dublin, as Fibber Magees' Wednesday night DJ! It's not a far stretch for me, since I used to spin at clubs in "real life".

I was speaking with my friend Cher Harrington (DJ extraordinaire), a few weeks ago and telling her how much I love being a DJ. She said...Dublin! (Cher! lol) Next thing I knew, I was in IM with Otawan Fouquet and putting Wednesday Nights at Fibber Magees together. *laughs* It has been a real high for me. The Dublin staff have been wonderful to work with. They have made me feel right at home. Otawan is very encouraging and supportive of the talent at Dublin. I am impressed with the way she juggles the schedules and events and still has time to chat and lend an ear. Ajay McDowwll is a hostess for Dublin, my Wednesday night teammate and "Danger Twin". She's not only an excellent hostess, she's a genius at keeping track of chat! (I can't follow chat to save my life.) I don't think Wednesdays at Fibber's would go half as well without her. Her positive energy just fills the place! Then there's Spook Maroon, the shift manager of Fibber Magees, who calmly keeps the night going smoothly. Thanks to Spook, my sets run like clockwork. *smiles* If we run into a real issue with the stream or the sim's performance, Sitearm Madonna, Dublin's Sim Manager goes to work and gets it taken care of. All clubs should run this well! If I sound as if I'm gushing...I am. (I still love Diegoland...lol) It's been a great experience for me. I look forward to my Wednesday night breaks and meeting new people. I'm more relaxed and ready to build, when Thursday rolls around. *smiles*

A warning to my EID Customers: If you IM me about a product on Wednesday night, while I'm DJ'ing, chances are more than likely that I'll send you a teleport to Fibbers. *grins*

There's a great deal to be said for the art of entertainment. It's immediate, high energy, rewarding and very -very addictive! *laughs*

What's New???

I have been hard at work! Na...I just like to say that! I love building, so it's not really work. *smiles*
At Dreamscapes Gallery:

The Grande Mahogany Throne



Filigree in sculpted primwork in honey colored mahogany, accents this truly royal throne. Avalaible as a limited edition, each throne is numbered 1-5. Soft, sensual lines grace deep rich woods. The nightstands open and close by touch. The vanity has an opening drawer with sleek, gold lipstick and compact.

At Elements in Design:

The Ahava Bedroom Set

Soft, sensual lines grace deep rich woods. The nightstands open and close by touch. The vanity has an opening drawer with sleek, gold lipstick and compact. I will be adding a dresser, armoir, lingerie chest and blanket chest.

A special new item...."My Snuggle Sleep Pillow"These body pillows are sculpted and textured to look like feather pillows. They aren't sort of like pillows...they ARE pillows! Best part? They are sold separately and have a snuggly pose by Craig Altman!

At Elemental Muse:

Dark Dreams Necklace & Earrings

A romantic cascade of deep, rich, blood red pyrope garnets in aged silver, flowing to just above the decolletage. A dream as dark as midnight and as sensual as a rose.
A special thanks you to sachi Vixen of Adam & Eve, for the lovely dress and hair! ...sach, your timing couldn't have been better! lol

Midnight Fire


Necklace , Earrings & Bracelets



Midnight Fire combines the radiance of Flame Aura Crystal and Aqua Aura Crystal with the soft glow of Copper.


Primmy? You could say that, at 253 prims on the necklace alone! LOL- I love it though and I hope you will too!